A naive young brunette is drinking imported beer and jotting down a few words in a journal at my local dive the other night when a greasy guy ten years her senior sits down next to her and they begin to talk. I catch snips of wide eyed liberal, second-year-of-college type chatter when the conversation turns to vegans.
her: Oh yes I am a vegan! How did you guess?
him: Just a hunch I suppose. I heard a funny story about a vegan PETA lobbyist who was trying to get Ben & Jerry's to stop using cow milk in their ice cream. He said to them, "would you subject human mothers to the kind of treatment the cows who provide your milk receive"?
him: Well the Ben & Jerry's people said, "But breast milk is for baby's, it's an unfair comparison." So the lobbyist simply replied, "you're right, and cow milk should be for baby cows."
her (completely serious): Wow, so what happened? Did they start using breast milk instead?
me: Bartender, another double over here.