overheard on an elevator

Guy One: Man I've been sick for like a week and a half now.

Guy Two: Oh yeah?

Guy One: Yeah I've been hacking up all this nasty jell-o stuff.

Guy Two: Oh yeah? What colour are we talkin here?

Random dude in a tie is horrified.

Guy One: Oh man like green radioactive waste colour.

Guy Two: Yikes, you sit and watch that stuff?

Guy One: What the nuclear waste? No I didn't watch it, why?

Guy Two: Ya gotta watch it for a minute y'know, make sure it's not moving. If it's moving you should see a doctor.

Dude in a tie and woman pretending not to hear both squirm.

Guy One: Ahhh you're right, could be like a nasal tapeworm or something.

Guy Two: Yeah.

Guy One: Yeah.

Me: lol.